Do you sometimes feel like packing it in. No point. No one is listening, reading or paying any attention. I do. I have had many moments where I have just wanted to step back and to stop for a bit. However I have invested so much into my work and what I am building. My blog, my ideas and future products that I would love to develop.
Yes always creating and dreaming. Although like everyone self doubt and life sometimes make things difficult to keep on going. Does this happen to you?
Keep going even if you want to quit. You will get there!
This post is for all of you that are thinking of calling it quits.
Don’t!
Keep on going.
Things will happen. It might not be the millions of dollars you would like to earn, or the dream job that you would love to get. However what you are doing will lead you to the next great thing. If you are working at your craft or blog at home it is a skill that you can use to leverage to the next step.
Make things happen yourself.
It is also your outlet.
Without an outlet to express yourself and just be you, it is hard to be happy. Everyone needs something that they feel happy doing. A hobby, a passion an outlet to just be you!
If you are like me a SAHM (Stay at home mum) having an outlet and something for me is needed. I cannot give it up.
It is mine and you never know where your passion might take you. Keep going! You are great and don’t listen to others comments. Just keep plodding along.
Just give things a go. If you try something you might be good at it and it will all work out. You never know until you try!
What is your passion? Do you have a blog? Are you secretly writing a book? Do you make clothes or do you paint?
Have you had moments where you thought it is all pointless but you have kept on going? Let us know.
I must say that all this talk of double dipping and new mums supposedly rorting the system is hypocritical if you ask me.
New Parents – Hopefully will be still able to claim the parental leave.
The government voted for this paid parental scheme. It was structured with part coming from the employer and part from the government. Government minister wives have even made use of this scheme. It was all above board and if you were entitled to the parental leave payments why not let this help you if you are a new parent. It all helps.
Why is it that we are now having conversations about who works and who doesn’t. I for one would like to challenge any person to say that a mum that is a stay at home parent does not work. The only difference is that they are not in paid employment. This mother might be racing everywhere and going above and beyond for her family but this is not listed as work, due to no payment for said tasks.
Working mothers do it tough too. They drop their kids off at care or have family to come and help. Without care these mums would not be able to work and to contribute to society, their household and progress their careers.
It does not matter if you are in paid work or not. Looking after kids, family and a house is a big job as well. Doing this with a full time job is hard too. It is all a balancing act. No one is better or worse, it is just different.
It now seems like mothers are under attack. I know that is not actually true but that is the way it appears. Joe Hockey was asked if “Double Dipping” was fraud and he eventually said yes. Now he is back peddling. So I suppose in his mind all women/men that took advantage of this paid parental scheme, which is legal and was voted in by him and the current government are breaking the law.
be the primary carer of a newborn or recently adopted child
meet the Paid Parental Leave work test
meet the Paid Parental Leave income test
be on leave or not working from the time you become your child’s primary carer until the end of your Paid Parental Leave period
Just in case you are worried that paid parental leave might not be available for you, there is a note on the website that says:
“The current Paid Parental Leave scheme has not changed. It will continue to be available to eligible customers.”
Let’s just hope that it does not get changed at all, or very little if at all.
What are your thoughts? The government is now claiming that it is the parents fault for taking advantage of a legal scheme to help them spend more time with their new baby.
If there is a way for new parents to spend more time with their new addition why not take that up and give yourself more time to bond, and get to know your new little baby. It could be a mother or father that wishes to do this, and does not always have to be the mum that is claiming the paid parental leave.
Are you a new parent? Have you been lucky enough to get the paid parental leave? When I went on maternity leave with the twins I did not have this option and plus I was on a contract.
If paid parental leave was available when I had the twins and I was in full time employment I would have taken advantage, as it would have given us help when we really needed it. Caring for two new little people and not earning a wage was a shock to the system.
Let us know how this talk of double dipping is affecting you. What are your thoughts of all the back flipping?
Today was Mother’s Day and I’m sure you called your mum, did family things with the kids and spoilt the wife, and just had a great day. We did a bit of this. I had a very early wake-up call due to one kid wanting to help finding some My Little Pony toys. She even tried to wake me up by waving a crystal above my head, thank goodness it did not hit me.
I eventually got up and got the kids breakfast. Hubby then woke up and I got to open my gifts that I have been curious about for a few days now. One gift in particular I told hubby I wanted so Julia and Daddy went off to the post office to secure the book I wanted. The rest of the gifts were things that the kids purchased from the Mother’s Day stall at school, and hubby got some things at the shops the other day.
My Mother’s Day Gifts – I wonder what the kids got me?
So for the curious, I got the following for my pressies:
2 lots of sunflower seeds from the girls
1 magnet meal planner for the fridge from the girls
1 book about all things to know about sewing. This book tells you how to do all things you have said, “I wonder how you do that?” Now I will know and have the book to tell me. Yes, I am armed with the info I need. Now I just need to magically find the time and space to do what I want and all will be right with the world.
PJs from hubby (very happy with this as I needed some new ones)
After the grand opening of my amazing gifts and putting a movie on for the kids, hubby got busy making me and his breakfast. Well, mine was breakfast in bed to be precise. So what did he cook me?
Hubby made me Sticky Apple Pancakes and that’s not all, he made them all heart-shaped for me. Yes that is amazing don’t you think! Thanks to IGA for sending me such a lovely gift box for Mother’s Day.
Ingredients ready to make Sticky Apple Pancakes – All from IGA
Ingredients:
40g unsalted butter, cubed
2 pink lady apples, cut into thin slices
40g sultanas
½ cup maple syrup
375g Greens Original Pancake Shake
Method:
Melt the butter in a non-stick frying pan over medium-low heat.
Add apples and cook for 5 minutes then add sultanas, maple syrup and 1/3 cup water. Simmer for 10-15 minutes, stirring occasionally until the apples are translucent and the sauce has reduced and thickened. Remove from heat, cover and keep warm.
While apple compote is cooking, prepare the Green’s Pancake Shake according to packet instructions. Cook pancakes as directed.
Spoon the apple and sultana compote over the pancakes and serve immediately.
Creating the apple and sultana compoteThe finished product – all ready to eat!The girls serving me breakfast in bed with daddies help of course
After we had our yummy breakfast, we got all rugged up and headed out to see the sculptures at Scenic World. It was a very cold day and we have had over 70km wind gusts so about 5 layers helped me feel warm.
We all walked over 4km, went on the railway, cableway, the skyway and the walkways. No wonder I am so tired.
On the walkway trying to spot the next sculptureThe kids on the glass floor in the skyway. It is opaque and then becomes clear.
What did you end up doing for Mother’s Day? Did you stay in due to it being freezing? Or venture out with the family? I was lucky we got to see the sculptures as today was the last day they were on. Some were very interesting and others were rather odd and morbid. We all had a great day and it was nice to be out and about. Getting some exercise was a good thing for everyone to be doing, we all walked a lot today.
I hope you had a great Mother’s Day.
If you wish to cook this yummy recipe that hubby made for breakfast or something different, you can visit theIGA Recipesfor more inspiration.
Thanks again to IGA for my fab Mother’s Day gift box it was yummy and made my day!
Branson went on to say that unless you have a job that requires you to fly a plane or the like, you probably can do your job remotely. He even went on to say, “Companies that forbid the practice, such as Yahoo, put pressure on families and limit opportunities for women, according to the Virgin Group founder.”
Brilliant. Yes you have hit the nail on the head! Many women myself included are highly skilled and educated. They wish to give back but due to family commitments it makes things difficult. Working from home is ideal. You don’t have travel. You can focus on the tasks at hand and of course get more done. There are so much on offer now to make telecommuting easy for all. There is Skype, Google Docs, Dropbox and more. Why not hang onto your best assets and knowledgeable employees that want to work and will go above and beyond.
Happy that she has a work from home job.
If you find that one or a few staff members are not pulling their weight. Well you give warnings and then you make the decision to either let them go or forfeit the telecommute option.
I for one would give 120% to be able to work remotely in a good job with great pay. (I have noted that lately some work from home roles are underpaying for what they expect you to do. One full time role was a management role and expected 40+ hours a week, conference calls overseas via Skype and to manage maybe 100+ websites. This they were paying at least 60K less than the going rate for this position. Not sure if it was the company or the fact that since you are working from home they have undervalued everything. The work is still the same, the job is still the same so therefore the pay should be the same as well. What do you think? I do accept that you don’t need to travel anywhere for your role and that is a bonus but why should you get short changed?)
Employers are doing themselves a disservice. Brain drain is a big issue. It does not have to be simply mothers or fathers wishing for a more flexible family friendly lifestyle. If you don’t treat people well, they walk. Loosing staff that know all your processes is tough. It takes a long while before you can train new staff to know what the former staff knew inside and out. This is a cost to the business in knowledge and also to money. You need to retrain and rehire.
Many employers offer you the world and then don’t deliver. They promise flexible work and telecommuting options, however whenever you seek to use this option there are myriad of excuses for why it cannot be applied to you and your role. You have not been here long enough was what I always got told, and another amazing one, we need you here to manage things.
One place I worked for I was there five years and I lived the furthest away. A day here or there would have been amazing, but no it was not to be. The girl who lived less than 30 mins away was always working from home. You would have thought three years somewhere and putting in extra hours and working on projects that were successful would have qualified. No it did not.
I wonder what the magical number is that qualifies you to work from home from a corporate or organisations point of view. Is it what value you can give them? Or more like is it seen as a perk and not a value to the business?
In February 2013, Marissa Mayer, Yahoo’s Chief Executive put a stop to employees working from home. She believes that working side by side is better and more helpful for business and staff members. I do understand that interaction is nice and having catch ups is always something to look forward to. This can still happen if you have a fortnightly or monthly catch-up with say a team that is working from home and see how everyone is going. Maybe on these times you get everyone to come into the office to touch base and have a day in the office, although the rest of the work is from home. Now there’s an idea. What do you think?
Marissa Mayer is not the only one that has adopted this notion of side by side working. In the Sydney Morning Herald article it also mentioned that Patrick Pichette who used to work at Google as the Chief Financial Officer has also the belief that working side by side is more productive. How did Pichette work somewhere where they encouraged working remotely with “Google Apps” to allow employees to work from home to now saying that working side by side is more productive? In the article Pichette says the following:
“”The surprising question we get is: ‘How many people telecommute at Google?’ ” Mr Pichette said at a talk in Sydney on Monday. “And our answer is: ‘As few as possible’.
“It’s somewhat counterintuitive. People think, ‘Well, because you’re at Google you can work from anywhere.’ Yes, you can work from anywhere, but many just commute to offices . . . Working from the office is really important.”
Coffee and tools to work from home. Off to get a lot done!
I do understand that brainstorming and bouncing ideas off people does help a great deal, however quiet time to reflect and think is needed also. Maybe it could be a bit of both, some days in the office and some days working from home?
It is 2015 and more kids are tech savvy and will be wanting flexibility when they enter the workforce. I want it now and I’m not considered a kid. Why are we still that rigid when it comes to having staff work from home? As long as the job is getting done that is the main thing.
From the businesses point of view it is a cost saving if staff don’t have come to the office and have a permanent desk, phone and computer. They don’t need to provide this if you have a remote role (I know some places might give you a phone or laptop but that is rare). All they need to do is to maybe have a hot desk when you come in for team meetings and catch ups with your manager or team. Easy really. I just don’t see why it is so hard, especially in this age of technology and options.
I believe companies that don’t offer work from home and flexible options will not attract the right people in the future. We are moving to a work environment where you don’t have to be in an office. You could be on a beach or in your house with your pj’s on. As long as you are hitting your KPI’s the rest does not matter. For major corporates to not look beyond an office job is silly in my book, there are a lot of people with excellent skills that can do a great job from a home office, they just need a chance to show you they can.
What are your thoughts? Have you tried to work from home? Were you successful? Do you have a job that is a telecommute role? If so please share how it works for you.
Let us know your thoughts. Why not continue the discussion on our Facebook and Twitter pages.
Has your child said something funny? Was this funny thing clever as well? We had a full weekend of witty and smart comebacks. One could not help but laugh. At one point I was in hysterical laughter.
Saturday we went out for lunch. One child was eating her chips instead of the fish. Hubby said that a fish died to feed her and she should eat it up.
This child then said, “The fish is dead! It can’t feed me!”
Fish and Chips. However a dead fish cannot feed a person well physically that is.
Yes this is very true a dead fish cannot physically feed a person and of course a smart arse kid. She then went on to tell us what other things cannot feed her.
The same child on Sunday said something else clever and funny. I heard banging and a noise in the backseat of the car. I asked what it was. It sounded like she was doing something funny with the seat-belt. Of course she denied it, so then hubby piped in and said we can hear it and know what the sound was. Hubby told her that we are not silly and know what is happening due to being able to hear it and knowing what the sound might be.
Then this child replied…
“Daddy you don’t know the sound of a butterfly flying! You don’t know all the sounds in the world!”
She then went on to tell me that we only know the sounds we know and are aware of. We don’t sounds that we don’t know… you can’t know everything in the world.
Do you know what sound a butterfly makes when it flies?
Well this little person is a smarty pants isn’t she. Are you dealing with a child that has witty responses? What have they said to you that made you giggle?
Let us know your thoughts. Why not continue the discussion on our Facebook and Twitter pages.
I started my blog nearly seven years ago. I did it due to being at home with my new born twins and feeling disconnected from my previous life as a producer of websites and content.
I wanted to have something of my own. I was suddenly a mum to two new lives that I had to be there for. I loved this and still do. However I do love to work and to have something for me, and this work has become my blog.
Hubby does support me, but I feel he would be more supportive if I was earning a wage from the blog. Do you find that others don’t see value in something that does not give you financial gain? As a mother who stays at home to look after kids, I do feel that I am undervalued due to not earning a wage. Do you feel like this?
Getting ready to blog
Why is it that just because your hobby or passion does not earn money it is irrelevant!
I suppose coming home to a messy house is not ideal. I don’t love it either and I try, however I like to update my site and somethings are topical and of course I need to keep my site current. No one wants to frequent a website if it is not changing.
However I have left hubby with some things to tidy and he managed to tinker on his computer all day and find other more important things to worry about. So why is it that I am questioned over valuing my work or my passion over something less interesting like housework? I do get it that I am supposed to do some of it, but I would really rather be blogging all day and night if I had my wish. Sad but true. I just love it.
This is not a rant over men being terrible to women, or not supporting their passions. It is more of a question on the whole of society. Why is more value put on roles that pay a lot of money? I suppose this is the eternal question.
Women who do something and it is seen as tinkering or not really employed. If you have a job that is part time it can be belittled to not being a huge role and not that important. (I know a part time job is just as hectic as a full time one can be, plus you still have the house and kids to sort out!)
My main aim was to build a site that has value. Has a community and if that makes money that would be the icing on the cake. I would really love it to earn truckloads of cash but that has not happened. Maybe in the next year or so it might. Maybe my swish redesign will work its magic once live?
Don’t worry it is not all bad, I have been paid for sponsored posts, advertising and an affiliate deal. So there are some things that are working very well, however I would love more of them to tell the truth. I’m sure I am not alone on this. A lotto win would not go astray while I am wishing.
I know others have made it big with their blogs and have turned a passion and their much loved hobby into a thriving business. One day I say! One Day!
Some bloggers that have made heaps and heaps of money are:
Here is a list of top 50 earning blogs. You will see what they earn and how they fare against the others. I think what they have done is brilliant. Built a business that works online and from home. How cool is that! I bet they had their doubters when they were starting out, or getting to the tipping point. How silly would they feel if they had given up?
Without my lovely blog and attending blogging events I would not have gotten some work from home jobs. They were short term contracts that I helped corporates with their social media management. I loved it and it also allowed me to blog and to earn at the same time. However without the blog these jobs would have never have happened. I used my experience building communities, blogging on my website and others to help these organisations. See the blog has paid off in a way.
I was also lucky in 2013 to win a blogging contest that allowed the whole family to have a trip to the Gold Coast mostly paid for. Thank you blog I say! Wouldn’t you say that this is payment from the blog? I would!
I know I am not earning a full time wage but the blog is definitely picking up steam. Emails have come in the last few weeks to test out products, attend functions and to write on others sites, and be a guest editor. The blog is gaining in readership and authority. This can only mean one thing. World domination is imminent. I’m sure you agree, right?
My blog is my outlet. It is my own empire that I can do with what I wish! Yes you heard that right. My little piece of the pie. I know currently it is small and I’m no Rupert Murdoch, or Arianna Huffington, but you have to start somewhere.
It is my baby and no boss can tell me not to publish or to do one thing or another. It is all up to me. I control the direction of my site. I like working hard at something and investing in a site that could one day change my life completely.
What hobbies or passions do you love doing? Is it your outlet? Does your partner poo poo your time you pour into your sewing, craft, blog or other hobby? Have they had to eat cake when your passion has had a big win?
Have you been terribly lucky with all your hard work and now the website or passion is now earning a good income? Let us know. Who is laughing now?
Let us know your thoughts. Why not continue the discussion on our Facebook and Twitter pages.
I find that I look around my immediate neighbours and I feel that I am on a different timeline all together. Is it just me that feels like this? Is it a mummy comparison that I will never live up to, or is my way a hack for mummies?
Do you see other people have laundry hung out in the early hours and you have not got to the washing at all? These early birds are wonderful and are super organised. They have the first load of laundry out, and have taken in maybe one or two loads that are dry, folded all laundry and put them away! (I’m lucky to have it all dry and put out when the heat of the day is at its peak!)
Do you despair at the fact that you are on a different path? Sometimes I do, however I have now decided to work with it.
The despair over doing everything at different times than others.
How do you ask?
With the fact that I miss the magic drying window with the washing, and of course now due to the dryer not working, I have to have things on the line to dry. Being in the Blue Mountains makes things difficult as many days are rainy and now due to autumn and the impending arrival of winter getting clothes dry is going to be increasingly difficult. (We are going to get a replacement dryer but have not done so yet)
Now here is my brilliant wisdom….. if you are not doing this you will be amazed. After you follow this you will be like the early birds with their laundry on the line super early!
My fabulous hack to make things easier for me:
I do as many loads as I can and hang them on the line
I make sure the weather the next day is going to be fine or at least sunny to allow clothes to dry mostly. If they are just a little damp they come in and can finish drying on the clothes horse in the laundry.
I leave the clothes that cannot come in the house on the line overnight and now I am the early bird who has all the laundry on the line and getting dry.
My laundry on the line since last night. Now I’m the early bird today!
What things do you do at different times to others? Do you think it works well for you or does it cause issues? Everyone is different and you need to do what works for you. However at times I wish I was a bit different and I could channel a cleaning goddess. I still think hypnosis might be the way to go!
I have on occasion gotten up early to do laundry and housework, but that is never kept up as I do love sleeping in. Or whatever I can get that is like a sleep in, kids do throw a spanner in the works here!
Let us know what you do to make things a bit easier for you.
As you might already know the kids and I were lucky enough to have a preview of the Sydney Royal Easter Show. It was a HUGE day. We all got up very early as we had to be there by 9.30 for 10am. Yes this does not sound bad but when you are coming from the Blue Mountains and leaving in peak hour it can all go wrong so easily.
I thought it best to have more time up my sleeve so planned to be there for 9am. I did not want to be late. That would just be terrible!
We did hit a lot of traffic but all was good due to allowing extra time. Thank goodness for Google Maps and getting up early, oh and kids not whinging due to getting up early.
The show officially opened on Thursday (yesterday to be precise) and of course they are expecting about 900,000 or more people to visit. Now that is a lot of people coming over to your place for a visit! Glad I don’t have to tidy or organise for this event.!
So what did we think of the preview of the Easter Show?
The kids did not know at first where we were off to. Once we arrived I told them we are seeing the Easter Show before the public sees it. They did not know what public was. I then said, “We are seeing the show before anyone else does. It is not open yet and opens tomorrow”. This was understood and they felt very special about being at the showground.
First of all we were taken to every part via a train. It was not a massive train, more like a little train that takes kids and tourists around a show.
The girls waiting for us to leave on the train. It was very nice to be taken to every event at the show!
Our first stop was the Woolworth’s food pavilion.
They were still setting up the exhibits and doing final touches on the great artwork that uses vegetables and fruit. It looked amazing and is so clever. So much time and hard work has gone into this visual display.
Due to ANZAC Day being the 100th anniversary the show is commemorating this in the displays. You will note that they have signs with “Lest We Forget” and great tributes to our brave soliders that fought for us all.
Stop 2. Then we were off to see the animals
The big highlight was the animals. The girls really loved this part of the day!
Last stop was to see the motorbikes in the stadium
The kids were amazed at the skillful guys that jumped in the air with their motorbikes. They were daredevils and it was very impressive!
Julie Power who is a reporter for the Sydney Morning Herald was also at the preview of the Easter Show. Julie’s article mentioned the blog! Check out the fab story here!
If you are going to the show have a fun time. Make sure to plan your day with the Sydney Royal Easter Show website.
NOTE: Just so you know I realised after purchasing all the ingredients that the online recipe can be altered for the number of people who you would be cooking for. I only used 2 capsicums cut in half to not make too much for an individual meal. However I did end up with a lot left over and that went in the fridge for the next night’s dinner.
The following ingredients are for 4 people. If you need to change this. Click on the number and change it with the up or down arrow on the link above for the recipe.
Making the stuffing: Cooking the beans, rice, and with all the other ingredients.
Ingredients
1 1/3 cup cooked brown rice
1 1/2 small zucchini diced
3/4 small red onion diced
4 red capsicums
1 cup kidney beans drained & rinsed
3 1/2 tablespoons of heaped fresh coriander finely chopped
1 1/2 teaspoon lemon rind
3 1/2 tablespoons pine nuts
Salt & pepper
2 tablespoon olive oil + splash for cooking
I substituted the following: Instead of coriander I used parsley, due to hubby hating it. Instead of purchasing pine nuts I used almonds due to having them already. I added some parmesan cheese to the top of the capsicum so that it would add to the flavour and give a nice consistency.
I used almonds instead of pine nuts. I already had almonds at home and thought it would be cheaper to use what I already had.
Jackie from Body Beyond Birth told me that you need to pick food choices that work for you. If you don’t make things from scratch all the time it will be hard to keep up. Eat well and incorporate it into your every day life. Make it easy for you.
Instructions
I put my oven on to 180 degrees as my oven is gas is old and funny. The instructions on the recipe say 150 for an electric oven. Make sure to your line your baking tray.
I halved and cleaned out my capsicum pieces. I like to make sure that they are ready.
Cook brown rice, drain, pour back into pot & cover off heat for 10 minutes.
Cook zucchini & onion in a fry pan with a splash of olive oil on medium-high heat for a few minutes
Once softened & starting to brown, take off heat & set aside.
Combine all ingredients together except capsicums.
Spoon mixture into capsicums.
I added parmesan cheese and left off the olive oil drizzle in the recipe.
Bake for 30-40 minutes until soft & cooked through
Serve immediately
The capsicums ready to be stuffed.
I know I added some things to this dish and it was not exactly as listed. It tasted amazing and the addition of the lemon rind made it have an extra burst of flavour. Having the almonds made it have a nice texture and it was a great addition to a fabulous and easy dish.
Making it a main meal option
If you would like to make this as a main meal you can.
You can add mince or meat if you are not vegetarian. One good tip is to make sure that the capsicum pieces are a little bigger if it is a main meal, or have a few more if smaller.
You can play with what you add to the stuffing for the capsicums, and have different fillings for different menus. You could have a totally vegetarian dish and then switch it up by maybe adding some cheese in the stuffing mixture, or say shredded chicken and other root vegetables. The choices are endless and you can be as creative as you like.
Rice & Bean Stuffed Capsicums ready to eat. Yum. Just right for a side dish or for a main meal.
I hope this helps with some dinner ideas or maybe for lunch? You can have it for both. This is super easy dish and helps to make sure that you are getting more vetables in your diet. Well I suppose it depends on what you put in the stuffing.
Healthdirect Australia who manages the national Pregnancy, Birth and Baby service conducted a survey to find out the concerns parents have being new parents, about pregnancy and the birth of their child or children.
Did you know that many parents have thoughts that they are unable to share with others. Sad really. Every parent has probably had the same thoughts and sharing will make you not feel so alone.
Pregnant and wondering what it will be like being a mummy.
“The online survey of 1,011 expecting or new parents found that 53 per cent reported experiencing some issues that were so personal they couldn’t tell anyone.”
I do understand not wanting to share very personal information but at times having a person who you trust can help a great deal.
What were your biggest fears when you were pregnant?
Mine was just around the health of the baby and that the birth went well. Initially I was thinking that we were having one child, but that thought soon ended and the worry over a multiple pregnancy entered my head. I was fine but my doctor was rather concerned.
From the survey they were:
Something being “wrong” with their baby (49%)
Miscarriage (42%)
Coping financially (34%)
Baby crying… please go back to sleep!
Emotional support is a big thing that is needed in the first stages of parenthood.
71% needed significant emotional support in the first six months of parenthood
Men and women looked to their partner, friends and family as well for their support network.
GP’s was next on the list
Online forums was noted to be a good source of support as well.
I for one was super tired and a zombie like person after the birth of the twins. Constantly getting up every three or so hours to feed babies, change them and to make sure all is well with little people made me very, very, very tired!
It is no surprise that one of the biggest challenge once you have a new baby is the lack of sleep that parents face, especially the primary care giver. The next major issue was if your little bundle does not sleep at all. I was very lucky my kids slept well, I don’t know how I would have managed with babies up non-stop and I with no sleep either.
Factor in recovering from birth and if you have other children to care for as well. This would push your limits.
Sleepy baby
One third of respondents reported experiencing miscarriage. 32% sought counseling. It is difficult to talk about loss, feelings and pain.
“Pregnancy, Birth and Baby was set up specifically to help people struggling with issues around pregnancy and birth, and that includes pregnancy, stillbirth, neonatal and infant loss. We’d encourage anyone dealing with a tough time to call us on our 24 hour help line on 1800 882 436, or visit our website at www.pregnancybirthbaby.org.au.
I have my down times when everything feels horrible and like I am a complete failure. Yes I suppose everyone goes through this. Terrible mother moments, and self-doubt creep in.
I then look at all the good things that I have done.
My kids are:
Happy
Healthy
Smart
Love hubby and me
Giggly
Funny
Active
Considerate
Helpful
Caring
They are also sometimes naughty, silly and don’t listen but that is kids for you.
On the whole. I am doing a good job. I think you are too. Don’t beat yourself up over some little things. So what if the house is a mess. So what if you did not have a shower to drop kids at school. If you brushed your teeth and hair and managed to get kids dressed and sorted for school that is an accomplishment in itself. You can always have a nice relaxing shower or bath while kids are at school or care. This way you can relax!
Focus on the positives. Take small wins and if someone offers to help you accept it. When the kids were babies I had family come over all the time to help me out. It was a nice time and much needed.
A father with his new little baby. Finally sleeping. Now not to move!
Oh and one other thing. If you are pregnant and about to give birth. Freeze about three months of meals in a freezer. If you have to add rice or salad that is easy, but having all the hard cooking done makes things ten times easier, especially when you are tired and don’t have the time or energy to cook.
Don’t worry about reaching out for support or help. This is what these organisations and groups are there for.
Anything that helps and makes you feel better is a positive and is good for the family.
See below for all the info about HealthDirect Australia and Pregnancy, Birth and Baby.
ABOUT HEALTHDIRECT AUSTRALIA: Healthdirect Australia is a publicly funded company, established to provide all Australians with access to trusted health information and advice, when and where they need it. We deliver a number of health services, including Pregnancy, Birth and Baby- free 24hr advice and through pregnancy, childbirth and the first year of parenthood. For more information visit: www.healthdirect.gov.au.
ABOUT PREGNANCY, BIRTH AND BABY:Pregnancy, Birth and Baby is an initiative of the Federal Government and offers free, confidential information and support to women and their partners through pregnancy, childbirth and the first year of parenthood. The service is also available to friends and relatives.
Becoming a parent can sometimes be challenging or overwhelming, and it’s reassuring to know there is expert help and support available whenever you need it, 24 hours a day, seven days a week:
By phone: call 1800 882 436 at any time of the day or night. Our staff can answer any questions you may have, give you advice on what to do next, and redirect you to other useful services.
Video call: Pregnancy, Birth and Baby is one of the world’s first health services to offer a secure, high quality video call option, 7am – midnight, 7 days: http://www.pregnancybirthbaby.org.au/video-call
Online: The Pregnancy, Birth and Baby website provides information for expecting and new parents on a range of topics. The information is easy to understand, up to date and has been subject to Healthdirect Australia’s strict quality assurance processes: www.pregnancybirthbaby.org.au
Let us know your thoughts. Why not continue the discussion on our Facebook and Twitter pages.
It is 2015 isn’t it? So why does it feel like we are living in the 1900’s or worse?
I know the 1900’s were not all bad but if you were female and wanted to be accepted as an equal, work in similar fields like men and earn equal pay it was not a great time for you.
However you could mistake our current time for having the same issues. Yes crazy right?
In the news just today was a report about a senior female surgeon, Gabrielle McMullin, who told trainee female doctors that it is best to have sex with a male who harasses them, as it is easier than not having a career at all. Why is this acceptable to tell trainee female doctors that this is okay! Why is a woman telling other women that this is a good way to advance your career? Just shameful and horrible in my book!
Happy International Women’s Day. How do you celebrate?
“Dr McMullin referred to the case of Dr Caroline Tan, who won a 2008 sexual harassment case against a surgeon while she was completing surgical training at a Melbourne hospital. Dr Tan was vilified and has been unable to find work at any public hospital in Australasia despite the legal victory, she said.”
If someone harasses you and puts the hard word for sex, you have every right to say NO! Saying no and not engaging in sex, or anything should in no way impact your career or your person.
Below are more quotes from the Sydney Morning Herald article:
“Her career was ruined by this one guy asking for sex on this night. And, realistically, she would have been much better to have given him a blow job on that night,” Dr McMullin said in the criticised ABC interview.
“What I tell my trainees is that, if you are approached for sex, probably the safest thing to do in terms of your career is to comply with the request; the worst thing you can possibly do is to complain to the supervising body because then, as in Caroline’s position, you can be sure that you will never be appointed to a major public hospital.”
I am not sure if Dr McMullin was just stating the facts that the work place culture is so bad that it has allowed this sexual harassment to be tolerated and not reported. I do understand that women don’t report crimes due to wanting to progress in life and their careers, however this does not help anyone. It keeps the perpetrator in the environment to strike again. The cycle just repeats itself.
I’m also at a loss to why a female surgeon would be teaching this to young female doctors. She is helping this terrible culture of harassment to continue by allowing this to be accepted. If more people stood up to these men who feel they can manipulate and dominate others, the culture would not allow the silence on these terrible incidents.
Why is it okay to let women or young girls be used sexually in order to gain in their career? Sex should not be a tool to be played with, and it is actually irrelevant in the role as a doctor and other careers as well.
Being female should not make you a target and silenced. This needs to change and NOW! Not later!
As said in my introduction; We are living in 2015 not in the 1900’s so why oh why do women still get underpaid for the same job a man does? Are we living hundreds of years ago? Are there laws to make sure there is no discrimination, Yes there is! However I am not sure how this is applied to equal pay as it does not seem to be happening. If it was, pay would be equal and my rant would be for nothing.
Many women are highly qualified, can do an excellent job and match or can outdo the competition. Fair pay for fair work I say! So why are women still being short-changed? Is it that we are too nice? I have heard that it is due to the fact we have babies and go on maternity leave. I personally don’t see how the possible thought that a woman might have a baby or not make her earning potential drop. Some women never have children and some do.
How about this for size, women live longer than men so we need the money! Pay us more so that we can invest in family, and the economy. If we had more savings for retirement maybe many women would not have to be on the pension due to struggling with little savings. Now there’s a thought! More money in the pocket would help women and society! Easy really, right?
Is the issue due to the fact that we don’t negotiate well enough? Or is it that corporations feel that they can get away with underpaying women and making more money off our brilliant and fabulous skills. I am not sure why it is still happening.
I for one am very frustrated about this. However how do you find out what others are getting paid and men who do the same job? I doubt they will tell you what they earn and many organisations have a private policy in place to protect this information. So due to all the secrecy you are flying blind.
You can do your homework for your industry and negotiate but that is about it. Do you think we should have more transparency on salaries? I do. If we were more open about what role gets paid what, women and also men would know what is fair and equal.
earnings for women in 1985 and now. From http://www.probonoaustralia.com.au/news/2015/03/australian-gender-
Why does it feel that we have come so far, but still not far enough. I still don’t understand why underpaying or harassing women helps our society. If we got paid equally it would benefit everyone. The money goes back to the family and helps fund education, feed everyone, put a roof over peoples heads and much more. It also shows that women are valued for their contribution and skills.
Why are women still penalised for being a mother and the caretaker? These unpaid roles save society a lot of money, it is mainly women caring for kids, elderly and the sick without getting a cent or nearly anything for this service. It is a massive saving to families and society. Fancy us sending a bill for our work. I am due over six years back pay! Bring it on!
Since today is International Women’s Day we can address these issues or put more thought into why they occur. It would be nice if the heads of companies and the like address the fact of equal pay and strive to make their workplace a harassment free environment. No woman wants to work in an environment that has a horrible culture and also underpays women, they will go elsewhere where they are valued.
When will people wise up to treating women as equal helps everyone. What do you think? Send in your thoughts.
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It took the girls well over 40 minutes to get dressed and organised for school this morning!
Yes that is a long time, especially when it should only take about 10-15mins at the most!
Do you find that your little one takes ages doing tasks that should not take forever? I do!
Due to the super long time taken to simply put on a uniform, socks, shoes and brush hair I of course was getting very annoyed. I’m sure if I said, c’mon we are going to the movies, swimming or somewhere fun, they would have magically gotten ready in record time. I have seen it happen so I know they can do it!
After nearly 15 minutes of the kids still being in their birthday suits, I gave the kids an ultimatum. If they were still like this when we had to leave, this is how they would go to school!
This picture shows how this morning went. Giggles, games, and silliness and no getting ready for school!
Yes I would have had to put two naked kids in a car and drive to school, but I was prepared to do this.
I would have clothes in the car for them if this did eventuate, but they were lucky that they got with it and managed to get dressed although super slow.
As I was getting upset and angry about this, I took deep breaths and kept on reminding myself. If they don’t get dressed I will leave as promised, and they can deal with it in the car or at school.
I think they saw how annoyed and angry I was at the progress, and realised mummy would follow through with her threat. Scary if they had not dressed well or at all!
I was thinking maybe it is our morning routine that gets them out of sorts. But thinking about it our morning routine is a good one. We get up, eat breakfast, kids pick out their uniform, have a shower, get dressed, get bags sorted and leave for school.
The girls were full of beans and had the giggles which did not help. Maybe I need to have them in separate rooms in the morning to speed up dressing? Have you had to do this? Did it work for you?
Have you ever ended up taking a non-dressed child to school or somewhere else due them not being ready? Let us know what happened.
What is it like at your house? Do the kids muck around and take ages getting ready for school? Or are they good and get ready quickly?
Let us know your thoughts. Why not continue the discussion on our Facebook and Twitter pages.
2015 is my year to focus on me and changes for the better.
I had grand plans:
Get fit.
Get toned.
Eat well, or at least healthier and cut down on my portion sizes.
Have you still kept up your goal from Jan 1st 2015 to be a fitter and healthier version of you? I’m sending you a big virtual hug for all those that manage to keep going with a busy and hectic schedule.
Yes I have tried but as mother to two active and on the go kids, plus doing everything else a mum orta do I don’t end up fitting in exercise. Does this sound like what happens with you?
I don’t know how you end up feeling if you neglect the exercise, but if I end up missing out I get annoyed, frustrated and a little crabby that I did not manage to fit it all in. Silly really but that little bit of time for me that allows my body to unwind, stretch and relax does make a massive difference in my day and mood. It also allows me to feel better and therefore be happier.
So how can this be fixed?
Just doing 20 minutes of exercise a day. It can be in the morning before kids get up. While they are at school, or sleeping.
I was approached by the lovely ladies at Body Beyond Birth , Becky and Jackie. To trial their 12 week program. I of course would love to be fitter and healthier so I was happy and delighted to trial their amazing program.
The program is aimed at busy mums. Becky and Jackie have wonderful instruction videos that are Pilates based and help tone your core and pelvic floor (Yes we need to remember to exercise this area!) Yoga videos are available to watch also as well as meditation
The recipe pages are divine, look yummy and are good for you! They have recipe’s for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
The site also has great print outs of what are actual portion sizes and other great nutritional info that is a good read.
Breakfast Smoothie from Body Beyond Birth
What are my thoughts so far?
I only joined last Tuesday. I have done my first week. I love the exercises as they make me feel taller. The stretching and toning the core is exactly what I need. I need to focus on my back and stomach to ensure I don’t get more back aches and of course take care of my pelvic floor.
The week one exercise video was good and all about form and control of the exercise.
Week two’s exercise video was great as it is progressing with some holding techniques and allowing me to stretch and work other areas of my core, stomach and back.
When I first signed up, I did not know where to place myself. You can put yourself as a beginner (stage 1), Someone who exercises a bit (stage 2), or someone who is full on and wants to push the limits (stage 3). I chose stage 2 and this seems right for me. However during my phone conversation with Jackie she said that if you are at the wrong stage and the plan is too easy or too hard they can move you to the most appropriate level for you. Jackie said, “I want for people to be happy with the exercises they are doing. We don’t want to have it too hard for some people or too easy. We are happy to fix this for a client if needed”
I love the fact that you can take this exercise program anywhere. All you need is an iPad or Tablet device and you can do your 20mins of exercise.
The exercise videos from all weeks are available to access during the program. If you would like to redo week 1’s exercise video you can and then progress to the week 2’s or other weeks depending on what you would like to do.
Yoga with Zoe, from Body Beyond Birth
Outcomes
I will be sharing my outcomes on the blog each week. So please stop by and see how I’m going. I should have done the my measurements but have not so will do that soon (I will not be sharing but would like to know if the program has helped and made a difference)
Please feel free to drop by Body Beyond Birth to check out their fab site and see if you would like to do their 12 week program as well. Or you can just do their 7 day trial to see if you like it. Give it a go or drop them a line.
Do you find since kids it is a struggle to fit in exercise? Let us know what you do to make sure you fit it in.
Let us know your thoughts. Why not continue the discussion on our Facebook and Twitter pages.
Many people assume if you have twins you must have had IVF. Worse still, total strangers think it is perfectly fine to ask you to confirm just how your children’s conception came about.
Friends who are “older” – including those without twins – complain about attracting the same curiosity from people they barely know.
And same sex couples (“who is the father/mother?”).
The answer oh curious stranger is, “none of your business!”
Cute little baby. Who cares how you were conceived you are wonderful and beautiful.
Perhaps when I receive such questions, I should respond in kind by asking the stranger if he/she had sex to have their child/ren?Maybe I could throw in some other up close and personal curly questions such as their medical history and maybe what they earn?
For the record, I never answer questions about how our girls were conceived.
The reasons are simple.
I don’t want to set up a “natural versus assisted conception” thing
It is not just my story to tell – it’s a story shared by my family
And It just doesn’t matter
Do you get asked if you used IVF? Would you feel okay asking a complete stranger if they had to have medical intervention to have their kids?
Why would I share such intimate details with a complete stranger? I don’t see any benefit in having this discussion.
Of course I would have to be living on another planet not to know couples that have used IVF due to one or both parents having an issue with fertility, or one parent having a congenital issue they don’t want to pass on or because they are a same sex couple in need of an egg or sperm. Or for whatever reason. There is certainly no shame in taking advantage of the wonders of medical science but it is damn personal stuff.
I sympathised with Nicole Kidman when she was forced to justify to millions of strangers all over the world her use of the term “gestational carrier”. Sure it sounded a little unusual but I think she was just saying, “hey this baby is my precious child and the technology involved is not the focus”.
It does not matter how you conceived your children as long as they are here, happy and nurtured. Whether the journey started with fours years of trying, one night of passion, or IVF, AI, GIFT or whatever is irrelevant.
It is no one’s business but yours. If you choose to tell family or friends that’s up to you. In my book, being asked by a stranger how you conceived your kids is just weird.
Have other parents of multiple birth children encountered such a question? Are we particular magnets for such inquiries or have single bub parents heard them too? Maybe the assumption is that all twins and triplets are IVF babies? Hey, prior to the first IVF bubs being born in 1978 people did have twins and triplets you know.
Has the frequent use of reproduction technology created a new social acceptance about quizzing people about how their much loved children came about?
Let us know your thoughts. Why not continue the discussion on our Facebook and Twitter pages.
“I have two children who are so close in age it’s like having twins.”
Really? You know what? I reckon having twins is the only thing that is like having twins.
Lately, I’ve had a lot of mothers say that although they don’t have twins, they understand what it is like. Bless you, all but what the?
I am not taking anything away from the hard yakka of having kids whether they are 15 months apart or five years. It’s just that having two children of different ages is not like having twins. Having twins is the only thing like having twins.
The girls at a little over 2 months.
Like all mums of twins, I had two kids instantly – and I was a first-time mum. I had no choice but to dive in at the deep, deep end. I had to get used to it quickly and woman up. Yes I said woman up.
I carried two bubs for nearly nine months then kapow, out they came. Two babies to breast-feed, two babies to cart everywhere, pack for, strap in the car, unstrap, nappy change, bathe, dress, calm, entertain, fret about. And all when you are one person.
I fed the twins at the same time every three hours or so. I woke up both babies to feed them burped them, change their nappies and then put them back down for naps. I felt like a robot with so little sleep. Most new mums are sleep deprived but make mine a double!
Breastfeeding just one bub at a time? How amazing would that be? I can only dream!
You would not imagine all the things I had to take with me to go to the park, the shops or even just a park visit. It was like I was leaving home every time I packed up the bags. Nappies, wipes, burp clothes, multiple changes of clothes, pram, bottles with breast milk in them, cool bag to keep breast milk okay and more. I felt like a packhorse!
I made sure to only leave the house after a feed and had some milk just in-case one was hungry or I got stuck. Hey, all mums do this but I just needed double of everything!
And even now when they are six and at the same level wrangling two people who want to do everything “now” or worse, yesterday because they do everything on high speed running everywhere, never walking, I wish I had an older child to help me wrangle them to a safe stop. Oh, and my kingdom for some hand-me-downs instead of having to buy two of everything – and often two of the same item but in two different patterns, colours, styles.
Mummy and the girls on the 27th of Sept, 2008. Katoomba Hosp. Julia on left, Lillian on right.
Mums with kids who are 15 months or say 11 months apart have children very close in age – agreed – but they are not twins!
When you have bubs one at a time you have kids at different stages of development and can leverage that to get things done but also spend special one-on-one time with each of your kids. While one is playing with blocks or napping you can feed bubby and truly be with your baby.
Achieving one-on-one time with the girls has been a challenge. I have listened enviously when other mums talk about having that precious time alone with each of their children when they first came home. Or later when baby number two is asleep so they can play with their toddler or taking toddler to the park when their oldest first goes to school.
I have found ways to get that one-on-one time with each of my girls but it has not been easy. When just one would wake in the night I often thought it was her deliberate way to get special cuddles with mummy. I still do. Hubby and I take a daughter each to different things on the weekend to get that quality alone time but we have to wait until Saturday each week when his work week is at an end.
Julia with daddy. She was 3 months old and we flew to Coffs Harbour to visit her grandparents. Her first plane trip and she does not remember it.
Okay, okay so twins is not all pushing a bolder up a hill – or a double stroller through a busy supermarket aisle. There is no playing the noise police to ensure an older child doesn’t wake the baby. Or packing for different ages and stages when you leave the house. Or complaints about those hand-me-downs.
And I do get that siblings who are close in age can share a special bond and even be super close. Great, but they are not twins so quit saying that.
Or am I the only one that feels like this?
Do you have twins? Have you had other parents tell you they have kids that are like twins even though they are not? Do these parents think they understand how hard it was for you early on and when they are older?
Mummy with Lillian. We flew to Coffs Harbour when the girls were 3 months old. Lillian’s first trip on a plane and she does not remember.
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This post has also been published on Kidspot. Discuss this issue with other parents.
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Does making school lunches make you cringe? It makes me wonder what I could add to the lunch boxes this year to keep little people interested and maybe try a new food or two. Yes I have two very fussy eaters. I never thought this would happen, as hubby and I are not fussy and try and experience different foods all the time. However my little ones don’t.
I have struggled to change this and I try and add a new food here and there to keep interest up and to add to their diet. One kid would like to be Junior Masterchef and I use this to get her to try more foods than she would normally. She does a test taste a few things due to me saying as a Masterchef she needs to know what they taste like.
So as you can imagine making two very fussy kids lunch boxes for school is a chore and I never know what to pack. I do try to make it healthy and a good mix of things. I normally have a sandwich of Vegemite/cheese/chicken/turkey, some piece of fruit either, watermelon, apples, pears, strawberries or a banana. I also sometimes throw in yoghurt, carrot and some other snacks. I do give a treat every know and then and that could be some biscuits, a cake we cooked at home or a square of extra extra dark chocolate.
Sometimes the kids do have a canteen lunch and I lived in hope that they would see things on the menu and want to give it a go. The school they go to has a very healthy canteen so if they order something it should not be too bad and crossing fingers might expose them to different foods and tastes.
“With nutrition at the heart of IGA’s lunchbox inspirations,the local grocer has worked closely with a local nutritionist to ensure the
recipeshave plenty of healthy options for parents to choose from, presented in a creative way for kids to enjoy.”
Are you like me and require some inspiration for kids lunches? IGA has some great lunch box ideas and I’m sure that you will be a lunchbox legend as well. Since school is going back next Wednesday in NSW, this might give a hand to make the first week back easier.
Tips from IGA to help you make some awesome school lunches:
Cut out sandwiches with a cookie cutter. Make it a fun shape that your child/children will love. I have done this and been very surprised it worked so well. I used hearts, cars, flowers and other fun shapes. The kids came home and said I loved my stars and hearts.
Create the “WOW” factor with colour. Kids love colour and this will keep them interested in their lunch box
Bake some healthy cakes/muffins/cupcakes. Store the left over-overs in the freezer so that they are ready for the school lunch box. They’ll stay fresh and be ready to eat by morning tea.
Pack the lunch box the night before. This help if you are rushed and feeling pressured to get it all done in the morning. I pack the twins lunches the night before and it saves a lot of hassle and stress. All I need to do is to get the lunch boxes in the bag and kids out the door and all is good.
If you child or kids love to help in the kitchen, get them to help and give a hand to sorting out their lunch box. This way they are more inclined to eat what they pack.
I will be checking out the suggestions from IGA as they look like great inspiration and ideas. As you already know dealing with fussy kids is never easy so any ideas that help is a good thing.
Did you know?
“Two thirds of parents are feeling the pressure from other parents, teachers or friends, and a quarter (28 per cent) that say there is even competition among other parents when it comes to preparing school lunches” IGA (Independent Grocers of Australia)
I am not sure if this has happened to me as no one has said anything and I really don’t care about what other parents do with their kids lunch boxes. I am more worried about my kids.
Disclaimer: This is not a sponsored post for IGA. I have decided to support their healthy stance on school lunches and due to my kids being fuss pots I am interested in anything that will make them eat good healthy food. I hope this helps you out and gives you some more ideas on how to get kids interested and for school lunch box ideas.
In 2015 I have decided to make things easier on me. Yes you heard that right, I am looking at solutions to give me more time and to stop some of the stress that goes with these tasks. Task number one is food shopping with kids. I can hear the sighs and ahhaa’s while I am writing this. I did do a couple of home deliveries last year but swore to keep it up and it did not happen.
Now we are in a new year I have just had my first home delivery of food products, and also a nice bottle of gin for my occasional refreshing mummy beverage. I was not worried about kids while shopping as I did it all from the convenience of my home.
Shopping trolleys will be a thing of the past with online shopping
I did not have to get changed or have a shower to go shopping. The best part of it was that the kids were not distracting me, from what I went to the shops for in the first place. I could focus on the task and get what I needed rather than every 2mins or less tell a child to stop creatively dancing in the aisle, or to get out of someone’s way, or that whatever they ask for it is going to be a NO!
Plus the other one that I keep on repeating, “Stop touching that, touching is not looking. You look with your eyes not your hands!” I am sure I am not the only one that has found the relaxing way to shop is online and it has definitely made me want more of this serenity while doing the food shop.
I would in all seriousness go clothes shopping than get the weekly shop for the house. Ladies I am sure I am not alone on this!
To go to the shops I would have to put two kids in the car, get them out, be a stressed out mummy while at the shops, get kids and shopping in car, get home, get kids and shopping out of car, and finally put shopping away but not before giving the kids something to do to allow me to get it all done. The kids do help with items that they can carry and help put away but once it gets a bit hard, I am on my own.
One thing that I noticed once I did the online shop, I thought that since I had ordered it they were in my kitchen. Yes very silly. However I had mentally gone to the shops but not yet received the product. Have you done this before? Or is it just me? Maybe I need more sleep?
Do you shop online for your groceries? Do you find it makes life easier and less stressful? I do, and I will be making sure the rest of the year I do more online orders. Spending hours at the shops for food when you could be doing other things is no brainer. I do understand that you might need to go to get the odd item and that is fine, but for big shops it is the way to go!
Next Post: My 2nd installment about our Maritime Museum Adventure
Catching up on some much needed sleep. Image courtesy of tiverylucky / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
While the kids were on school holidays, I took them to an indoor play centre. The weather was extremely windy and thought rather than sit miserably cold at a park, why not be indoors. I also did not want to have a tree fall on me or branches fall on us.
Not many people were there and there was one mother with her three kids, one the girls age, the other about two, and one a baby. She was frazzled and just in need of some time out. I understood! Being the sole carer and having no friends or family near by is hard. I sometimes lose the plot with two kids and cannot imagine an extra at the moment. Although I do think that if I did have another baby now the twins would be super helpful. We recently visited their baby cousin who is now four months old and they were acting like big sisters. Fussing, taking care of her and making sure she had her blanket on. It was super cute.
I ended up chatting to this stressed out mum while I was at the play centre and I helped her out. I felt for her. She did not have a lot of money and did not have her license so she relied on public transport. This is a big thing to handle when you are not feeling the best and dealing with three kids. Plus dealing with the whinging of the kids, “I’m hungry!’ and “Are we there yet!”
I helped with the baby, gave her older child some kind praise and encouraged the girls to play with her to make her included in the kids games. This allowed this mum to have some time to have a tea and put her feet up for a small window. Not a lot but a little bit helps. I thought of this frazzled mum when I read the story about a mum who fell asleep at a play centre. Another mother stayed and looked after her child while she rested and only left the centre once this mother woke and all was okay. Very nice indeed!
This mum who slept at the play centre was extremely embarrassed and upset that she had fallen asleep. To do this, this woman must have been utterly exhausted and sleep deprived and I do understand. This story and the lady I encountered made me think it was nice that there are people who take the time to help. I was glad that I was able to give this woman some help and kindness when she needed it, not like one woman years ago at the same centre. I asked her to watch my kids for small moment while I go to the bathroom. I was chatting to her, my kids were playing with hers. So I thought it would not be a bad thing to ask. She gave me a filthy look and said, “What do you want me to do?” Talk about rude!
Acting like this to others is just plain horrible and not helpful. God forbid you were in jam and needed the help of another person.
I hope they help you and not ignore your plea. For those that have this horrid attitude about helping or being kind to others, I hope that karma dishes you up something delightful.
If you don’t help why should you be helped in the future. Well that is my view.
I was glad that I helped this lady out the other week, and I hope that she managed to get more of a break. Talking to her I found out that her husband works shift work and long hours and she is in a town where she knows no one. That is hard. I tried to give her some things to do or to seek out that might help her. Playgroups, Mother groups, and so on.
Have you helped another mum? Or was it just someone that needed a helping hand and not a mum? It could be anyone.
Be kind and help someone if they need it. Have a great day!
