Tag: mommy

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3 years and beyond Potty Training University Study

Holding on longer

Both girls are doing very well with the potty training, and I suppose you could say that the training is nearly done. The next step is to have them get up during the night to go to the toilet, and we are not at that stage yet, both girls are heavy sleepers so end up sleeping through it all and we are still in nappies for night time sleeps.

Yesterday we went out for a picnic and the girls lasted over 3 hours without needing to go to the toilet, a great achievement. However Julia then announced in the car on the way home (only around the corner from the house) “We should have brought the potties mummy”, I asked why, and then she said, “I just did a wee wee”. Oh well she did a good job hanging on so long.   We thought it was funny that the blame was pushed back to the parents. It is our fault that the potty was not there and she had an accident.

Her chair in the car had to be taken out and cleaned, and now is all dry after being in front of the heater last night and this morning.  Daddy and mummy are very impressed at how good both the girls are doing with holding on. For my birthday we went to lunch and the drive to get there was over 20mins and they were so good and no accidents, I asked if they needed to go when we arrived and both said no. We managed to order lunch and half way through eating Lillian said she needed to go, so I took her. Once back Julia said she needed to go, so I took her as well. The trip back was accident free and the girls were very good and waited until we were at home to go to the bathroom.  A week ago we went to lunch at the same place and the girls repeated the same things, no issue and no accidents, they are doing very well.

I have a feeling that being at pre-school helps as they see other kids and are exposed to a bathroom at their height and it is easy to access. We have managed to go to parks, trips, playgroup (I bring the potties as there is only one toilet and if others are using this the girls might not be able to hold on), and shopping.

The girls are sometimes dry in the mornings but mostly not. I have read that this means they are not ready to transition to undies for night time sleeps. It will eventually happen, but what do you look for to see if your little one is ready? The link for Toilet training – staying dry at night from the Victorian State Government has fantastic information that will help anyone questioning if their child is ready or not. If they are ready, it gives some great tips and preparation for the parent/s.

Have you transitioned to night time potty training? How has it gone? I know it will be soon, maybe at the end of the year or next year for us. I don’t want to rush it if they are not ready. I am very pleased at how the girls are holding on longer, and very independent with going to the bathroom during the day and before bedtime.  Send in your comments and any tips or tricks that have worked for you.

Categories
3 years and beyond

Not helpful

Today I encountered a most unfriendly and rude soul. Not sure if it was a bad day for her or if it just her way. Read below to see if this has happened to you.

I was out today at an indoor play area. I got talking with grandparents while their grandchildren played. Mine were playing with the eldest child. I was holding on and on, but could not anymore; I had to go to the toilet. Before I got up the mother of the kids came back. I stood up and walked over to their table and said, “I am just going to the toilet, just in case something happens with the girls, if you can keep an eye on them that would be great?” It was met with a strange look like I was talking a foreign language and then she said, “So what do you expect me to do?”, I then replied, “I was just saying that I was off to the toilet and in case the kids were upset and they wondered where I was, that’s all.”

Kids seemed fine and I went to the toilet, she was a B#$ch. What is one to do when you are there by yourself with 2 kids? If there was a staff member around I would have asked them like before, but there was none to be seen. Talk about attitude….. It was like she was thinking she was mother superior and I was beneath her.

I for one have minded other kids while the parent went to the loo or to get a coffee if the place was unmanned. Why is it a reach to think that this might happen? There a lot  of responsibility associated with the role ( by this I mean, she did not have to do anything other than watch them). My kids were playing with her eldest and were all having fun. Was just concerned leaving them as I did not want to think mummy was leaving, they might have gotten worried or there could be an accident and at least the adult knows that I am coming back. Other things like people taking my kids without me knowing who you are do come to mind, if this person who did not help knows I will be back soon she will not allow someone to come and claim kids that are not theirs (well that is what I hope).

I for one don’t have family support to take kids or mind kids while I go and do things or at least leave them in the play area while I race to the bathroom. I think maybe some people who have help don’t know what it is like to have none.

One friend I mentioned this to, suggested it is sad that the lady was unhelpful and the loss of community that this indicates. I agree with this wholeheartedly. Why is it that we cannot help each other out more, especially if you are mum alone with kids and you need to urgently go to the bathroom?   Send in your stories of what has happened to you.

 

Categories
3 years and beyond

Accident prone

Yesterday I was searching for a toy under Lillian’s bed. I had to move the bed to get to it. I then bent down to do something and my thigh met the end of the bed at speed, and it hurt badly.  You can be rest assured that tears, swear words were uttered. I am now sporting a massive sore bruise that is telling me it is there constantly by throbbing.

To top it off I have a mysterious bruise on my arm that I have no idea where it came from and today I cut my finger on a tin. All of these injuries are located on my left side, so that is not good but at least it keeps the right side safe, as I am right handed.

Just cannot believe how sore the bruise on my leg is and how silly it was to have done it. Have you had a day or days when you seem to have accidents happen to you or part of your body?  If so what side has coped it?   Why does it seem that when you do one thing others happen as well?

Categories
Katoomba and Weather

Want to be somewhere warm

It is freezing here. We are facing about 3 days of severe wind with possible wind speed to get to 115km or more per hour. Last night I just laid awake and listened to the scary wind and hoped that the house did not end up like the one in the wizard of oz.  I am from Queensland and miss the beach and the warm weather. Why is it that we have to have a freezing cold winter, why can’t it be unusually warm? I know I live in the Blue Mountains and it is cold so what do I expect. A girl can dream of warm days at the beach, the current day dream is for the whole family to hope on a plane and go to Fiji or Queensland to a resort and to be pampered and be warm at least.

It has been windy all day and raining all day, from a drizzle to heavy rain. Just being out for a couple of minutes I feel the cold wind go straight through me… maybe I need to invest in warmer jackets and pants?

This afternoon when I picked the girls up from school it was raining, just getting a bit wet, I could not feel my hands. Not feeling hands did not help putting kids seat-belts on.

Current temperature is:

  • 4.5°C
  • Recorded min: 2°C
  • Recorded max: 3°C
  • Feels like: 0.6°C
  • Humidity: 98%
  • Rainfall since 9am: 11.2mm
  • Wind: S 18km/h
  • Wind gusts: 32km/h

However for most of the day it was about 2 or 3 degrees but felt like minus 4 degrees.

I hope you are all keeping safe, warm and that you are o.k from the strong winds.

If you have any recommendations for warm gloves send them in. My hands get so cold that I cannot feel them, not good as I fear that it will get worse. It is only day 5 in winter and it is so cold.

Categories
3 years and beyond

Costs of childcare

I don’t know about you but it is expensive to put kids into care.  Having two kids at once does make it more expensive, you have to double everything. In the news today there was a lady saying that she pays over $100 a day for child care (I would say for the cost she is in the city), I am assuming that is for one child. I would say that would need to be doubled for two kids.

Her theory of going back to work is a good one; she is trying to keep current in her chosen field. The more years you are out of the workforce the harder it is to get the next job.  I do agree with her, although I don’t want to go through all the stress and headache of putting kids into care to do a job that I do love, to not earn any money for it. With the rate of say $100 per day for one child it would not be a viable choice for me at all.

Here are some articles about childcare:

I know child care workers are underpaid and not appreciated enough. My girls bloomed with the two years they went to child care; however we could only manage to send them for one day a week. This one day cost us nearly $100 for just the day for both the girls. I think the workers need to get paid more; however I don’t see how this increase won’t flow onto parents.  The issue I have with child care and parents especially mothers returning to the workforce is the cost and the issues around it. The government is losing out on a great number of skilled workers who are in the same boat as myself, would like to do a part time role or say part time in the office and the rest from home. However due to non-flexible arrangements, no family support, high child care costs, and probably other things I have not listed, working is out of the question while kids are young.

Is it practical for you to go back to work?  I for one would love the change and chance to shine again in the corporate world; however it is not possible for the major reason of childcare costs, family support, and also the fact that I would like to stay home until the kids are at least at school. Even when they are at school, as the primary care giver you only have the window of school hours barring any sickness, and of course you have to drop tools when school holidays roll around.

Now the kids are in pre-school that is a cost and it is as stated times two, adding child care into the mix is not possible for us at the moment. I for one don’t understand how women and some fathers do it.  How do you work for the sole purpose of paying the child care centre? What do you do if the money you make is not enough for the bills for the centre? How does factoring in the travel , clothes, food and all the extras for the job help with the fact that child care costs are deducted from your salary?  If I got a job in the city, I would have to hire a nanny or carer to mind kids before school and after, to drop and pick up from school and to also to wait until I got home after work. This would add to our costs, especially with pre-school and commuting to the city.

I do think it is great women are doing work as well, and would like to know how you do it all.  I find it difficult with two kids and not working in a paid job.  Tonight, on the news there was some talk that the government  will help with the costs for child care workers, I do agree this would help, although if and when it will happen is another thing entirely. It is sad that we cannot pay them more and have reasonable fees that will allow parents to go to work and to have kids in care. Send in your comments on how you manage to find the cash for child care and manage with a part time/full time job.

Let us know your thoughts. Why not continue the discussion on our Facebook and Twitter pages.

 

Categories
3 years and beyond

I love sleep

My brain is active with things that I want to achieve, however I am just so tired and exhausted. The reason I feel like this is I am currently getting over a bad cold/flu, not sure what it was actually. Probably was the flu as I had fevers and cold sweats, I know too much info. Now I am fine but still tired and find that I am not thinking 100% clearly, so still must be getting over the germs. Another reason for being tired is two very active three year olds to look after and to entertain.

Sometimes I think it might be the lack of sleep I have had since the girls were born. People say it is hard to catch up on sleep and if you are constantly interrupted or do not sleep well this can not help. Maybe this is one of the other reasons, I am still sleep deprived due to having kids and looking after them. I don’t see this changing any time soon, I think I might have another 14 years of this if they leave home at 18. With the world the way it is and expectations of children to walk into a dream job without working from the bottom up, my kids might be back to live with us after moving out of home. So maybe my sleeping days will be numbered after they are 18 as well?

Some sites that might help if you struggle with losing sleep and being tired:

  • According to Scientific Amercian’s article, “Can You Catch Up on Lost Sleep?” states that if you miss sleep you acquire a sleep debt, to repay this debt and to feel less tired and better, you need to go to bed when tired, try and add extra hours each night and in months this might help.
  • Great articles about sleep and helping to get to sleep by sleepwriter.com

As I write this my eyes are heavy and I am thinking of bed. I am now off to dream sweat dreams in my comfy bed and to hopefully catch up from my sleep debt.

Do you have issues with being tired all the time? Has kids made it hard to grab a break or a nap to help this issue? When night time comes are you just wanting to curl up and go to sleep? I know I do. Sounds so anti social but that is so exciting for me at the moment, going to bed and being allowed to sleep in. Send in your comments.

Categories
3 years and beyond

The Toddler View

The “Enjoying Your Toddler” class was very interesting. The two main points for me were:

  1. How you talk to your child – Language is very important. If you as a parent say, “Stop doing that!” The child thinks, “What is that?”, or the parent might say, “Stop touching that!”, and again, what is that to the child. So the tip here is to say, “Stop touching the DVD Player/Computer”, make sure that what you are referring to is named.  This way there is no confusion on what it is the child should stop doing.This I do, however the girls seem to keep on going back and doing it anyway. I was asked what I do to try and stop this behaviour. I end up having to remove the child from what I don’t want them to do, and this happens repeatedly. Hope to get other ideas on how to deal with determined children and this behaviour.
  2. We did one exercise where one of us stood on a chair and held the hand of the other who was kneeling to pretend that they were the toddler/child. This was to mimic the way we treat kids when we have to quickly get to the shops and other outings. Only after 2mins or less my arm was hurting and I can imagine that it is a scary view of your parent if they are angry. It was brought to my attention very quickly that trying to be at their level is very important. I do this quite often and try and make sure that I knell down to explain things and to have chats and just be with each of my girls. However this cannot happen when you are out and about, holding hands when crossing the road or on the footpath, trying to hold your hand bag and other items.

Although I felt that I do the things mentioned, it is good to remember to always try to be at the child’s level, and to put things in a context that a child can understand.   Kids are not adults and as mentioned today, it is like they are from a different planet learning our ways as new members of our society.

Do you find that you seem to do everything right, and still you don’t get the outcome that you had hoped?  I am keen to see what next week will bring, as it deals with discipline.  What are your techniques to explain things to a child or tell them not to do something?

Just an example, last Christmas my mother told Julia that she had a nice sun dress. She looked puzzled and said “This is not a sun dress! It does not have a sun on it!” Yes she was right it did not have a sun on the dress. My girls and I suppose others kids take things so literally. We might call it a sun dress but it might be called something else entirely by the child.   This example shows how what you say to a child can be misunderstood or just lost. Choosing how you explain things and what you say can help fix some issues. I am keen to see how it will help in our household.

Categories
3 years and beyond

Enjoying your toddler?

Tomorrow I start the course called, “Enjoying Your Toddler”. Not sure if this course is aptly named, I have thought of alternatives. “Surviving Your Toddler”, “How to get your toddler to listen to you”, or “How to discipline your toddler”. These alternates titles is what every parent would rather call the course, although I do agree I would like to enjoy my children more, so maybe this title is the better one.

I am not sure what to expect from this course and I am keen to learn some new techniques to help deal with two wilful, stubborn, very active three year olds. Who knows. If I get one or two tips from this course it might help out and be the answer to some issues we have been facing currently.  The girls seem to be running amok and all over the place. I really think it is down to their age and the fact that they are exploring new things at school and through friends, testing boundaries at home is getting exhausting.

I will make sure to bring a notepad and a pen to take notes on any tactic that will help me out. If I do get a great tip I will let you all know, you never know it might help others as well.  Have you done any parenting courses? Have they helped? Or were they a waste of time?  If these courses were winners with you, what was the major thing that you got out of it?

Hopefully by the end of the course I will come out enjoying the kids more and have more skills to deal with issues. Thanks to Jeanette the coordinator of playgroup for bringing this course to my attention.

Categories
University Study

Busy with uni

Hi all, I am very busy working on the last assignment for university so have not posted lately. Sorry about this, however after assignment is done will post some more and will keep them coming.

Keen to get this long stressful assignment completed, then tutorial questions to do and study for the exam. Then after that I will be very pleased it is over for another semester.

Although I am working away at assignment and kids, I am really looking forward to my day off tomorrow and of course my birthday on Sunday.

Hope you are all well and more posts will start next week after uni assignment is done and submitted.

 

Categories
3 years and beyond Pre-School

My free time = 5 hours x 3

Do you ever have visions of getting everything on your to do list done? Well I do, however not all does get done. It is a frustrating situation but I suppose with kids and other things going it is understandable that this never occurs.  However it does get frustrating that some things still are a work in progress and are not finished.

It might be just me but once kids go to pre-school, I have it in my head that I have the day. No I don’t, I just have the magic hours between 9.15am and 2.45pm so I need to get whatever I need to do done in that window.

Lately I have found that the more I have to do, not much gets done. I end up doing bits and pieces of something and then never getting through a task completely. I am using my Swiss cheese approach, just doing each problem bit by bit, a hole at a time. Maybe this is the answer and I should just be content with this. I have been doing what I can do in the time available however with a brain that is overloaded on tasks, I find it hard to concentrate on just one thing lately. Have you had this issue? Or is it just me.

I do have some time 5 hours 3 days a week, those are the days that the girls are at pre-school. Currently they and I have a cough given to us by daddy, who got it from a workmate. Not something bad, but just a little tickle. The girls seem oaky so sent them off to school, but in the back of my mind, I am waiting for the phone call to come get them. Let’s just hope that this does not happen. (I sent them due to the fact that they are playing and are happy at home; don’t seem really ill, if they were they would be home)

I have a messy house still but need to prioritise, the university group assignment is due next Monday so need to put my head down and bum up and get it done. No television just working on assignment this week. So cleaning will have to wait until assignment is done, or just a bit of tidying tonight.

Off to get my cuppa tea and start work on my assignment again. Send in your comments on how you structure your time off when kids are at school? What can you get done in the time allowed? Are you now a speed worker due to the small free time window? I wish I was.

Categories
3 years and beyond Pre-School

I must wear the purple top

Why is it when you are cutting it fine time wise, one or both of your kids has an issue with something. By issue, it could be a tantrum, or hysterical reaction to mummy telling them that they cannot wear the purple top due to it being dirty.

This issue with the purple top happened to me this morning. I had about 30-40mins to get kids dressed and ready for school. I had the bags already to go, lunches as well. I just needed to get kids dressed and then all in the car. Easy I hear you say. Well it wasn’t.

Lillian decided that she wanted to wear the purple top that was very dirty. I explained that she cannot wear dirty clothes out, while this was happening Julia decided that she wanted to wear shorts. I explained that no one is wearing shorts as it is very cold and she would be freezing.

I gave Lillian 3 choices for tops. None of them she allowed me to put on her. While I tried to put them on her, she busiest herself taking them off quick smart, after ages of crying and me being very firm and some taps to her bum she decided that she needed to listen and choose a top. She allowed me fighting all the way to put on a top. I then tried to put on a jumper and she was again hysterical and did not want it. She claimed everything was itchy. Well that is news, it was never itchy before. Oh well, decided to give her another one that might not be itchy and she still complained about it being itchy, but I persisted. She needed to wear a jumper, it is very cold.

OH, what a time spent just dressing one child! That saga took over 20mins. Then I still had to dress Julia. Julia was better about it, however insisted on shorts and wanting to wear her sandals. Again, I told her that shorts and sandals were out, that she needed to dress warm as it was cold. She was much better behaved than Lillian was, but I think that is due to seeing Lillian in trouble and Julia did not want that to happen to her.

So by the time two kids were dressed in warm outfits, it was 9.05am; I need to be driving by 9.00am to get to school in time. This morning it was not bad, however I don’t like to be late. Do you have dramas getting kids dressed in the morning or to go out? Do they allow you to dress warmly for a cool/freezing day – Current temperature here is 4.5degrees, but feels like 1.2degrees. So as you can see sandals and shorts is not a good idea.  Do you have any tips or tricks to help with a hysterical child that takes off the clothes you put on her?

Categories
3 years and beyond

Happy Mother’s Day

Happy Mother's Day
Happy Mother's Day

Today was Mother’s Day and in our household it was also my husband’s birthday. It was a busy day and a day that I thought that I was forgotten about, until the girls presented me with some chocolates and a print out that they both coloured. I know it was both our days, however was a bit disappointed not to be able to sleep in, however got the chance to have a nap in the afternoon.

No fancy lunch but had a great time with the girls and hubby. Next Sunday is my birthday so who knows what other surprises are in store.

We all at Mummy to Twins hope that you had a good Mother’s Day, and that you enjoyed yourself.

I found this image for the Manifesto for mums online, and was on the Lose Baby Weight facebook page – I love the first bit, “The needs of our kids are simple: Clean bums, full tummies and a warm bed”. How true is that. This image is also right that everything else is a bonus.

Kids were so tired from our big day they fell asleep in our arms, I had Lillian and daddy had Julia. We just bundled them up and put them to bed, it was the cutest thing.

I am counting down to my special day next Sunday and of course my time out for next Saturday, facial in the city is booked and will confirm it tomorrow. Looking forward to it all. Have a great day tomorrow and off to bed now too.

Categories
3 years and beyond Uncategorised

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day
Happy Mother's Day

Today was Mother’s Day and in our household it was also my husband’s birthday. It was a busy day and a day that I thought that I was forgotten about, until the girls presented me with some chocolates and a print out that they both coloured. I know it was both our days, however was a bit disappointed not to be able to sleep in, however got the chance to have a nap in the afternoon.

No fancy lunch but had a great time with the girls and hubby. Next Sunday is my birthday so who knows what other surprises are in store.

We all at Mummy to Twins hope that you had a good Mother’s Day, and that you enjoyed yourself.

I found this image for the Manifesto for mums online, and was on the Lose Baby Weight facebook page – I love the first bit, “The needs of our kids are simple: Clean bums, full tummies and a warm bed”. How true is that. This image is also right that everything else is a bonus.

Kids were so tired from our big day they fell asleep in our arms, I had Lillian and daddy had Julia. We just bundled them up and put them to bed, it was the cutest thing.

I am counting down to my special day next Sunday and of course my time out for next Saturday, facial in the city is booked and will confirm it tomorrow. Looking forward to it all. Have a great day tomorrow and off to bed now too.

Categories
3 years and beyond

Losing my cool

I promised that I would not yell, and it I try not to. However lately the kids have been doing the following:

  • Not listening
  • Looking at you and ignoring you when you speak, basically not listening
  • Dropping things and not picking them up when asked
  • When trying to get out of the house they are not letting me dress them, brush their hair and when it comes time for socks and shoes they play hide and seek
  • Crying and becoming hysterical when I put them down for a rest. If I put them down for a rest they are so tired and exhausted, but they never sleep. It ends up that each child hurts each other. Then mummy gets upset, no rest, and ends up having to go and sort it all out yet again.
  • Defiant
  • Stubborn
  • Negotiating to the point of being frustrating. “No mummy, 5 more minutes” or, “Mummy how about we do this and that… that’s the plan mummy”.
  • Doing things that I told them not to do, “I told you not to seat on top of the heater, it will burn you, get off it and stay away!”
  • Saying No like it is the only word in the English language; however no one listens to mummy so the kids just do it regardless. “I said NO! Stop doing that!”

Lately I have been getting so angry and upset about it all, trying to control two wilful kids is hard work. As you can imagine if I was a cartoon, I would have steam coming from my head, ears and maybe other places. The annoyance that happens is just amazing, deep breaths are needed and more. How do you cope with this type of behaviour? Does it make you turn to a gin and tonic? Well a relaxing drink might help a bit, but I do agree not the answer.

So what is the best way of coping and dealing with this? You cannot just leave kids with the family and take off for some much needed me time. Well you can, but it would have to be planned.  I have found that you need to nip some of this behaviour in the bud before it gets too out of control.

So here are some tips that might help:

  • When the child is good, praise that good behaviour
  • Listening to what your child has to say sometimes helps. I find that once I listen to the girl’s ideas and thoughts, they are happier. Sometimes the child is frustrated that you are not listening and taking them seriously.
  • Make sure when you say no you mean it. Don’t go back on your word
  • Choose your battles.  The girls have been selecting their clothes more and more, although it is not what I would have chosen, it is giving them a sense of independence. I only put my foot down to make sure that they wear a jumper if it is cold.
  • With choosing clothes and other things I only allow two choices of anything, this makes it easier and you are not deciding on things all day
  • My girls want to take toys with them everywhere, I say bring one toy and if it is too big to carry by themselves they must leave it in the car
  • If they are in trouble I put them in time out. I have started a time out in the corner of the room for a couple of minutes. This ends with the naughty child crying and trying to convince me to stop what I am doing, I ignore it all and talk to the other child and let the child have her time out. Once over, I then ask why they were in time out. The child normally says that I hurt sister or something like that. Then they apologise, and can re-join the fun and get to participate in the family activities again.
  • Deep breaths and counting to yourself to calm down a bit
  • A nice soothing cup of tea or coffee if that helps you
  • Putting blankets, pillows and other rugs down on the floor to lie down to watch some movies. After a big day out this calmed my energised little bunnies.  This will have a nice calming effect and make sure to turn off the light.
  • Change of scenery – going to the park, visit friends or just go for a walk. If you have to pop the kids in the pram and get walking.
  • Counting to 5. If you get to 5 you go get them and help them either, get in the car, putting on clothes, shoes or help with other things. It can also help when you want kids to come in and be in places that you need them to be. I find if I do this they are racing around to do it before I get to 5. I only do this after much time has passed and we need to hurry up and get moving.

I read an article that suggested we think about our death, I know morbid and sad. However it was a good way to think of things, how your kids will remember you after you were gone. Will they think mummy was angry and yelling all the time, or will they think of some nice things about you?  It got me thinking, that my pact to control the frustration needs to get better as I want good memories left for my girls. I want them to remember a loving mummy and not remember an angry mummy.

How has dealing with a wilful, determined and stubborn toddler affected you? Has it created a more tired mother? I know for me it has, and made me try and develop other ways of dealing with this situation finding creative solutions. Send in your tips and tricks for handling and coping with your toddler.

 

Categories
3 years and beyond University Study

Flexible education not that flexible

If you don’t know, I am studying a Masters in Project Management. I have elected to study online as it is easier to fit in with having kids and my lifestyle at the moment. I did start the degree without kids, but chose online as working and finding time to get to class might be an issue, online delivery seemed to be the best way forward.

Last week I noticed that the draft timetable had been listed, it was noted if you needed a remote location for this exam to contact the coordinator. Upon finding out that there was to be an exam, I contacted said coordinator and was told not to worry that I would be able to have the exam at a remote location. Just to explain, a remote location is not at the campus. The campus is in the city, and I currently live over 2 hours away.

Exam room waiting for everyone to sit their uni exam. Wish us all luck!
Exam room waiting for everyone to sit their uni exam. Wish us all luck!

 

I emailed a request to have a remote location organised due to me being far away and commitments with my twin girls. After over 4 emails this was not taken into consideration and I have to come to campus to take this exam.  As you can imagine I am not happy with this result. The university sighted costs and issues with getting my results back in a timely manner.

One of the emails stated that I could have a remote location for the exam under special circumstances. I then cited the fact that I need to drop kids off at pre-school for 9.15am and pick them up for 2.45pm. I need to be at the university for 9.20 for a 2 hour exam. It takes me 2 hours to drive or at least by train to get to the city. The exam is slated to finish at 11.30, then I would have to drive back, so factor in another 2 hours travel time. I think I would miss school pick up in the afternoon as well. If the exam was local could drop kids at school, do exam and then pick kids up. No issues at all, other than the worry about passing this exam.

The coordinator thought she was being helpful to start the time of the exam at 11.30 to let me drop of the kids at school, but then who picks them up? We are in an area with no family or many friends close by. I have made more friends that have said that can help, but I am not leaving them with one child it will be two. Also I am not sure when I will be back.

I ended up asking my husband to take the day and work part of it from home, he was lucky that he could do it. Normally he is flat out with projects and it might not have been possible.  What would have happened if I had no one to ask? Why is it that the university can sight costs, I am paying nearly $4,000 for just one subject each semester, and I am not using any of the facilities on campus? The least they can do is to help me out a bit. I do understand that there is a cost associated with remote exams, but why can’t I double up with another university that is doing the same thing. Would this not reduce costs?

One of the reasons that the university claim that I need to physically be at the University for the Exam, is that they say that I am located in the Sydney Metropolitan area. If this is the case, I should be able to walk to George Street and go to the movies, maybe a spot of shopping at Centrepoint as I am so close and walking distance. What a laugh!

Living in Katoomba it is very interesting that sometimes you live in the country and then the rest of the time you are considered that you live in the city. Interesting, I fully believe that it is structured to benefit the business owner, not the customer. I am already paying inflated fees, and an extra one that they have decided to add for just this year and the remainder of my course.

I also feel that it discriminates against women with children. How do you manage to retrain, have an interest and earn the same or more money for the next job?  A degree or like qualification will help. Doing flexible online study I would think that they would be open to remote venues for the exam, now it has put a whole lot more stress on the day. Thank god I have a husband that can take the day, what if I had no one? Would they have stepped up then? Child care is too expensive, pre-school is costly. To then have to pay to get to the exam by putting kids in care would have really annoyed me no end!

Why can other universities have exams in Wentworth Falls and Katoomba, and mine Sydney University cannot do the same.  I am still annoyed, frustrated and felt stressed out trying to organise how I will be able to attend the exam.   As a mother and a person that would like to do well with her career, I find this unacceptable and this needs to change. University and other educational institutions need to step up and make exams and courses easier to access for mothers and parents. I think they need to consider the individual and then assess from there.

Have you been annoyed at your educational provider? Have they made things difficult for you due to being a mother and having other commitments? Why is it so hard for this to be taken seriously, I think that they did not put any weight into the fact that I am the only person that takes care of my twins during the week, and I don’t have help.   Has this happened to you? Send in your comments.

Let us know your thoughts. Why not continue the discussion on our Facebook and Twitter pages.

 

Categories
3 years and beyond

Just A Mum?

This has been emailed around, and added to social networking sites. Not sure where it generated from, but thought it was apt on explaining how motherhood is a very important role, but not given enough thanks and praise. See what you think. The lady in the story invents a snazzy title for herself. What title do you think would sum up all the work that you do? Send in your suggestions and remember to vote for us for Best Australian Blog.

A woman, renewing her driver’s license at the County Clerk’s office, was asked by the woman recorder to state her occupation.

She hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself. “What I mean is,” explained the recorder, “do you have a job or are you just a …?” “Of course I have a job,” snapped the woman. “I’m a Mom.”

“We don’t list ‘Mum’ as an occupation, ‘housewife’ covers it, said the recorder emphatically.

I forgot all about her story until one day I found myself in the same situation, this time at our own Town Hall. The Clerk was obviously a career woman, poised, efficient, and possessed of a high sounding title like, “Official Interrogator” or “Town Registrar.”

“What is your occupation?” she probed.. What made me say it? I do not know. The words simply popped out… “I’m a Research Associate in the field of Child Development and Human Relations.”

The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in mid-air and looked up as though she had not heard right.
I repeated the title slowly emphasizing the most significant words.  Then I stared with wonder as my pronouncement was written, in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire.

“Might I ask,” said the clerk with new interest, “just what you do in your field?”  Coolly, without any trace of fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply, “I have a continuing program of research, (what mother doesn’t) in the laboratory and in the field, (normally I would have said indoors and out). I’m working for my Masters, (first the Lord and then the whole family) and already have four credits (all daughters).

Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the human ties, (any mother care to disagree?) and I often work 14 hours a day, (24 is more like it). But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers and the rewards are more of a satisfaction rather than just money.”

There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk’s voice as she completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the door. As I drove into our driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career, I was greeted by my lab assistants – ages 13, 7, and 3.

Upstairs I could hear our new experimental model, (a 6 month old baby) in the child development program, testing out a new vocal pattern. I felt I had scored a beat on bureaucracy! And I had gone on the official records as someone more distinguished and indispensable to mankind than “just another Mum.” Motherhood!

What a glorious career! Especially when there’s a title on the door. Does this make grandmothers
“Senior Research associates in the field of Child Development and Human Relations” And great grandmothers “Executive Senior Research Associates?” I think so!!! I also think it makes Aunts “Associate Research Assistants.”

Categories
3 years and beyond Family

The Mother’s Day Code

Mummy to Twins has created the Mother’s Day code – Download the image, print it out. Get ready for Mother’s Day by following the code. I know the code says no white goods, but I cannot wait to get my new washing machine. Been without now since April 25th, so if it does come that weekend, I will not have an issue. So over going to the laundromat.

The Mother's Day Code
The Mother’s Day Code

 

Mother's Day Code - US Version
Mother’s Day Code – US Version
Categories
3 years and beyond Family Uncategorised

The Mother's Day Code

Mummy to Twins has created the Mother’s Day code – Download the image, print it out. Get ready for Mother’s Day by following the code. I know the code says no white goods, but I cannot wait to get my new washing machine. Been without now since April 25th, so if it does come that weekend, I will not have an issue. So over going to the laundromat.

The Mother's Day Code
The Mother’s Day Code

 

Mother's Day Code - US Version
Mother’s Day Code – US Version