Baby in fresh nappy, hopefully changed by daddy. Image courtesy of photostock at FreeDigitalPhotos.net.
I read with interest the article by Kasey Edwards, “French fathers don’t change nappies” that appeared in the Sydney Morning Herald. Why is it that a woman is saying the following?
“Men have more important things to do than change nappies.” Valeire Pecresse, French conservative politician.
When you decide to have children you do it as a couple not as an individual, well that my point of view. I for one don’t think that a woman would want to not have help with the baby and if the father decides they are above changing a nappy how does this helps the mother take a break away from the child? If the other parent cannot handle this duty then it is not fair to the mother and of course other help might be needed.
My husband helped out and changed his fair share of nappies, although I do agree in the article from Edwards that I did do more than hubby but that was due to him working and me being home more often with the twins.
That said, he did step up and care for his girls and make sure that a new nappy was in place no matter how terrible it was to deal with the old nappy. I am proud that he is a man that can deal with this.
I am not understanding why in 2013 this talk about men being more important to help their family and their new child. Why are men considered more important than the woman? Why is the man not wanting to help their child and give their lovely wife/partner a break?
Other women have been noted in this article saying that their men did not help with nappy changing duties, Madonna said that Guy Ritchie did not change a nappy as it is not a man’s job, interesting. A man can get you pregnant and a man can claim that he is helping and supportive but cannot change a nappy. Well helping with a nappy and child care is manly in my book. What about you?
According to the article it also lists Carla Bruni-Sarkozy mentioning her husband Nicholas Sarkozy did not help due to the fact that he is ‘a Latin Man’, not sure why this is something that makes you not help but he used it and it worked for him. Could the same be used the other way, I am ‘a Latin Woman’ therefore I cannot do certain things. Not sure why it would help you get out of doing personally. If you know please let me know.
Honestly if you tried that on me it would not pass and you would be so much strife your life would not be worth living. Dealing with twins as my first kids you can imagine the amount of nappies I changed and that we were faced with. Hubby had to help whether he liked it or not. He, as I mentioned was on board and loved being with his girls, and nappies was part and parcel of this.
Did your husband/partner help with changing nappies? Have they helped with all things baby and child? Or has it been just you? Send in your comments.
2 Responses
Lizzy Allan
August 28, 2013This is a great post, Suzanne. My partner, like Carla Bruni’s, is also ‘Latin’; he’s from Sicily. However, if there’s a nappy to be changed, he steps up to the job. In fact, he doesn’t just do it to get the job done, he genuinely enjoys it and coos and chats to our daughter as he does it, giving her heaps of attention and not rushing it at all. Unfortunately, he is an exception and I can definitely not imagine either of his two brothers ever changing one single nappy if they ever have any children of their own. My mother-in-law never asked her husband to change a nappy either. What annoys me in particular is when women like Valeire Pecresse make comments like that. What a load of BS. How are we ever going to achieve genuine equality between the sexes if women themselves have this attitude. I’m sure my mother-in-law agrees with Pecresse. I’m sure she was shocked when she visited from Sicily to see her son changing nappies. What I’d like to know is what these “more important things” that men have to do actually are, in this woman’s opinion. Fair enough, when they’re at work, they’re at work, but when they’re at home, they should contribute. My grandmother used to say “a man works from sun to sun, but a woman’s work is never done”. Mother’s need a little break sometimes too, or our mental health goes down the drain. Usually, when my partner is changing a nappy, I use those five minutes to do some other domestic duty anyway. My daughter loves getting her nappy changed; she loves the attention, the eye contact, the raspberries we blow on her belly. In my opinion, any father who refuses to change nappies is not only selfish, he’s also missing out on some of the most precious baby moments.
Suzanne
August 28, 2013Hi Lizzy, well written and agree with you 110%. My wonderful husband did nappy duty and enjoyed the bonding time with his girls. He adores them and if he can, he helps out.